hmsies.

Cultural experiences and funny musings by two twenty-somethings living abroad

This Is Why I’m Broke (for him)

Just days into 2013, we have perhaps stumbled across one of the greatest websites to grace the Internet.

Lo and behold, This is why I’m broke (www.thisiswhyimbroke.com/). As you can probably guess from the name of the site, it’s loaded full of cool and crazy stuff, stuff that you thought probably never existed, stuff you thought you would only find in films, stuff you want. From lightsaber chopsticks to flying hovercrafts, the website literally has everything and anything you would want. We decided to whittle through the catalogue of cool gizmos and present you our favourites from their selection.

Remote Controlled Tarantula

Scare the hell out of your nearests and dearests with an RC Tarantula! Life-sized and furry, it costs just $18. The legs even move separately so that it looks like a real spider! I could certainly do with something like this – I live with a bunch of pranksters in my student house and never good at finding good ways of getting them back. Reckon this will hit the spot though!

http://www.thisiswhyimbroke.com/remote-control-tarantula

Personal Submarine

Now this would be something to take with you to a place like the Great Barrier Reef! Forget scuba diving, get a submarine instead! At the low, low price of $2 million you can whiz around the seas at 3 knots without getting all wet and salty!

http://www.thisiswhyimbroke.com/personal-submarine

Hands-free Umbrella Dome

Gone are the days when gusts of wind bust your umbrella leaving you at the mercy of Mother Nature. The umbrella dome will keep you safe from the rain and allow you to turn up to meetings, socials and events without having that wind-blown look.

http://www.thisiswhyimbroke.com/umbrella-dome

Hover Bike

Ok, so you may only be able to use your new personal submarine in water, but you can use the hover bike for everywhere else! At just $46,390, you can hover around the place and make a great entrance as you turn up at the swishiest club in town or lectures at university. This gift would make a great addition for the German chancellor, Angela Merkel, as she turns up in Greece for yet more discussions on financial crises, whatever they are.

http://www.thisiswhyimbroke.com/hover-bike

Magic Wand TV Remote

Ok, it may not be the Elder Wand but this comes a very close second! Using various gestures with the wand, you can do things like turning your TV on, switching channels and turning the volume up, and looking like Harry Potter at the same time! Spellbound to impress.

http://www.thisiswhyimbroke.com/magic-wand-tv-remote

Camera Lens Coffee Mug

Coffee-drinkers and camera enthusiasts, your perfect item is here! For $20, the Camera Lens Coffee Mug makes a great gift and will make heads turn as people think you have gone crazy for using camera lens for drinking your favourite hot beverage. The only thing you have to remember now is not to pour boiling hot coffee into your real camera!

http://www.thisiswhyimbroke.com/camera-lens-coffee-mug

Suit Pyjamas

If you have watched How I met your mother, you’ll realise these are the pyjamas that Barney Stinson wear (I’m just following my cue from the website here, haven’t ever watched it!). Made of silk and breathable, you can now go to bed feeling sharp!

http://www.thisiswhyimbroke.com/suit-pajamas

Go the f*ck to sleep

You’ve taken the kids to school, had a long day at work, given kids dinner as put them into bed, but they still won’t go to bluddy sleep. For $8, you can have this great faux-children’s book infusing rough language into a traditional children’s tale.

http://www.thisiswhyimbroke.com/go-the-fuck-to-sleep-kids-book

Gentleman’s ball scratcher

You’re relaxing on the couch, watching the football with a can of beer in one hand and a burger in the other and you want to scratch your balls without people looking at you thinking you’re a disgusting slob. Those days are now over! For just $15, you can now scratch your balls in style with a pristine ball scratcher.

http://www.thisiswhyimbroke.com/gentlemans-ball-scratcher

The Hangout Nest

Now, you can literally “hang out” in an outdoor lounger where you can chill out. Perfect for those summer days where you can escape the heat and enjoy a cool breeze through your nest! All for the cheap price of $15,000.

http://www.thisiswhyimbroke.com/the-hangout-nest

Toilet Seat Pedal

The number of times we all have arguments at home about who left the toilet seat up is surprisingly high! Guys get annoyed by having to constantly lift the toilet seat while girls get annoyed by constantly having to drop the toilet seat. Now, you can just lift or drop the toilet seat using the foot pedal and avoid unhygienic underside of the toilet seat!

http://www.thisiswhyimbroke.com/toilet-seat-pedal

DJ Cat Scratch Turntable

A treat for moggy. Your cat can now scratch those decks and become the next big DJ, if only the turntable also played music!

http://www.thisiswhyimbroke.com/dj-cat-scratch-turntable

Old Leather Book Laptop Case

Have a constant fear of getting your laptop stolen? I know I do. Problem solved.

http://www.thisiswhyimbroke.com/hardback-leather-book-laptop-case

Giant Inflatable Lounger

Perfect for the summer! If you ever find yourself with a bunch of friends at a nice lake near Munich on a nice summer day (I really want to go there again), then this will be perfect! Grab some buddies and some drinks and splash out!

http://www.thisiswhyimbroke.com/giant-inflatable-lounger

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One comment on “This Is Why I’m Broke (for him)

  1. Larry
    September 23, 2015

    I prefer http://www.thegiftsguy.com it doesn’t have adult products and is safe for everyone.

    Like

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