Cultural experiences and funny musings by two twenty-somethings living abroad
So who believes in spirits or even the afterlife? I have to say that I have always been rather curious about this and so when I heard that my local pub had booked a psychic for the evening, I could not wait to get my tickets!
Of course, as Derren Brown keeps telling us, there are many, many frauds out there but having checked out the psychic’s website – she seemed rather professional and had a whole team behind her: managers, advertisers etc. Her only-positive testimonials page did look a bit suspicious, although I was quietly confident that I would see some sort of professionalism during her show and maybe even learn a thing or two.
Well, as they say – keep your expectations low and you won’t be disappointed. Of course I didn’t expect a full lowdown of everyone’s deceased relatives in the room all forming an orderly queue waiting to pass on their spiritual, guided messages. But what I also didn’t expect was for the psychic to just… well…guess! She would stand there and look mysteriously into the far edges of the room, all whilst shouting out names at random, waiting until somebody in the audience would resonate with the name and or description.
However, even this task took a good while sometimes…
“I have an elderly gentleman here coming in from the spirit world. I am seeing the name Michael or Mike. He is a father. Does anyone resonate with this?”
– Silence –
“I am now getting the name David. Or Dave. Or Mick. Maybe it’s John? Ooh I think the spirits are teasing me here.”
– People start to snigger –
As soon as someone in the room put up their hand to say they knew a Gary, John or David who passed away, the Psychic would hone in on them and carry on with her elaborate guesses.
“Ok, so I have John here with me now. He is showing me.. oh I think I can see jeans. He is showing me jeans. John was wearing jeans when he died.
He is also showing me his toe. Did he have a problem with his toe, or foot?”
Man: “No, I think he’s just pulling your leg!”
The psychic continues: “Ok, well his foot wasn’t in a good condition. He is showing me the hospital now.. Did he have tests done in the past 2 weeks before his death?”
“Ok maybe in the last month?”
“No, not at all.”
“Um, maybe in the last year?”
The man couldn’t comprehend that his father John who was nowhere near the hospital when he died would come back from the spirit world showing the psychic a pair of jeans he used to wear. Definitely the spiritual message I would pass on to my loved ones I’m sure.
The psychic, however, was still undeterred and continued.
“Ok, now I see a Margaret. Margaret is appearing to me in a wheelchair.” Someone from the audience then pipes up, “Yeah, I know a Margaret in a wheelchair!”. The Psychic looks immediately relieved and starts to say. “Oh wonderful. Ok well she is with me now and..” before the man interrupts and exclaims “Thing is though, she’s not dead yet!”
The whole room roared with laughter! The Psychic was clearly not having her best night yet she was almost there. At least someone did know a Margaret in a wheelchair
The Psychic continued her guesses and her “visions” yet all she was faced with was “no” and more “no’s” and one man even said,
“I’m sorry love, but I don’t have a clue what the hell you are talking about!”
However, luckily for the Psychic, she finally managed to get it right! All sceptics reading this now, beware:
“Ok, I am seeing Bailey now. That’s just what the spirits are giving to me. I see a Bailey. There will be someone here who knows Bailey, I see it so clearly, I’m sorry, I just can’t get away from this name. Bailey really wants to come through..”
And he did!
A girl on our table tried to keep her laughter down as the Psychic was having her spiritual vision but she could do it no longer and eventually burst out laughing. The Psychic looks at her and asks:
“Does the name Bailey mean something to you my love?”
The girl replied: “Yes, I know Bailey! He’s my dead rabbit!”
Now, even the psychic began to turn a shade of red as the room roared with laughter once more.
“Oh ok love, well… just to say, he’s doing alright and well here in the spirit world.”
The evening included many more funny moments such as telling a young student that he would get a 2:1 even though his university doesn’t do Honors degrees as well as telling a man with a tattoo visible on his arm that he also has one on his back.
As they say, you could not make it up!
Unfortunately for the Psychic, I think a lot more people walked out sceptics than they came in however, Bailey the rabbit managed to come through to say hello and we can’t put a price on that!